- The Declaration of Independence is printed with Ron Paul's blood.
- Ron Paul turned down Superman's job.
- Ron Paul took a lie detector test. The lie detector tapped out.
- Ron Paul speaks in the universal language of love.
- Ron Paul doesn't believe in continents.
- Ron Paul is Bill Maher's hero.
- Ron Paul beat Atlas in an arm-wrestling match.
- Ron Paul can fly, but doesn't because its unconsitutional.
- Ron Paul holds the single-season homerun record.
- Ron Paul is 9 feet tall, but the weight of his conscience makes
him look shorter. - In the dewey decimal system, Ron Paul is 1.00.
- Like a duck's quack, Ron Paul's voice doesn't echo.
- Ron Paul is an impermiable membrane.
- God calls Ron Paul for advice.
- Ron Paul declared war on the war on drugs.
- Ron Paul uses tax returns of US citizens as toilet paper.
- Ron Paul is an element on the periodic table.
- Ron Paul supplies enough power to light Las Vegas for 15 years.
- Ron Paul is a constitutionalist because he wrote the Preamble.
- Greek myths acknowledge Ron Paul as the supreme being.
- Ron Paul has so many morals, he has to pay for two seats on a plane.
- Ron Paul reproduces asexually.
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